For the love of God, use your turn signal!

We have all had moments that are a little more aggravating than they could be, especially when they happen far more often than they should be. For me, such grievances occurred almost every time I got in my car and on what I hoped to be the open road. We’ve all been there: maybe you woke up late, or you took a little too long to get ready in the morning, or the kids dragged their feet—whatever it is, you’re a tad bit more behind than you usually are. You get driving on your way and are making it happen until you hit that busy intersection where cars are flooding the street. This intersection is always busy, but it's the best route to get to where you need to go. Cars just keep coming… on and on. All you long to do is join their frenzy and get to your destination. What seems like an eternity itself, more and more cars continue to go zipping by, with no end in sight. As you lament and wonder how in the world the city’s civil engineers still have their jobs— thinking who designed these streets?!—you notice someone approaching who is going a little slower in that endless stream of cars that have been buzzing by you which has been impeding any opportunities to turn and join the pack. This particular car’s speed is in that sweet spot where you wonder… is this guy turning?… could this be the moment I’ve been waiting for and my sole opportunity to pull into traffic? No, it doesn’t look like it… he’s still going pretty fast. I wouldn’t want to turn in front of him just yet. Surely, if he was turning he would use his—"OHHHH-FOR-THE-LOVE-OF-GOD! Use your TURN SIGNAL!!!” you shout as he barely slows enough to make his turn. The cars behind him, inevitably, are back up to pace in an instant. You knew, had he signaled and slowed properly, you could have joined the pack and been on your merry way. Ooooooooooo! I can’t stand these moments!

Yet, I’ve got to say, it was a culmination of moments like these that forever changed the way I drive and the way I handle stress on the road. Furthermore, it changed the way I handle life altogether.

It started when I realized that I was sick and tired of dealing with people who don’t use their turn signals. Sick and tired of people who sharply changed lanes without letting me know. Sick and tired of waiting at the light, face to face with the other line of opposing cars across from me waiting just like me for our shared light—my turn signal on because I needed to turn left, and anticipating the cars opposite me were going straight since they did not have their turn signal blinking away, I of course already bracing myself to wait even longer once the light changed so these cars in front of me can proceed and enjoy their right-of-way… only for the light to finally change and those opposing cars in front of me all of a sudden instantly deciding to turn right in front of me as the light changed. You know… because they never put on their blinker but chose to turn anyways! You know, I was just sick and tired of being sick and tired of grief on the road that could easily be avoided: if everyone just used their turn signal when they were supposed to.

It might sound silly, but isn’t it the little things like this that pile up and cause added stress that gets carried throughout the day? Maybe we don’t notice, but situations like this create grief that gets passed on to others. Maybe you bring this agitation into work and share it with a coworker by being a little less patient than you usually are? Or maybe we bring it home after work and get a little short with our spouse or kids? Isn’t that how stress accumulates, from little instances like the nonsense we face when we drive every single day?

Annoyance, discomfort, and stress can either pile up, get passed around, or it can finally urge us to learn from it and stop it dead in its tracks. For me, after countless years of mishandling the woes of inconsiderate and poor driving (and being an offender of it myself, I’m quite sure), I had had enough. It finally hit me that I was going to be a part of the driving ecosystem my whole life and I didn’t want to spend another moment letting it affect me as much as it had. I had that one last time where I hollered at my offender, “For the love of God, use your turn signal!!”

After those words left my mouth, it hit me… truer words hadn’t ever been said in my red mustang! Sure, obviously all my woes and grievances would be solved if everyone just used their blinking turn signal! Ha! Yet, that wasn’t the truth bomb that hit me between my eyes. It was my own offense that got me… the whole statement that escaped my lips was as convicting as it was enlightening.

“For the love of God… use your turn signal.” After ruminating on this and my angst turning into embarrassment, I thought to myself. Sean, what is the love of God? How am I supposed to love God? What is my love of God? Simple: we love God by keeping his commandments. I encourage you to read 1 John, as the author communicates this love in great depth.

For this is the love of God, that we keep His commandments; and His commandments are not burdensome. 1 John 5:3

I thought further and considered two of the greatest of those commandments:

And one of them, a lawyer, asked Him a question, testing Him: “Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?” And He said to him, “‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ Upon these two commandments hang the whole Law and the Prophets.” Matthew 22: 35-40

My burning desire for each of my neighbors to simply use their turn signal was only half the solution I had learned: I always used my turn signal, because I learned rather quickly that I never wanted to be that guy who didn’t. The guy who aggravated others on the roadway. I wanted to be safe. Courteous. Considerate. A good driver. A good neighbor.

Yet, that’s only half of the equation. I wasn’t being considerate enough to realize that maybe those who don’t use their signal as they should, haven’t learned what I had learned. Experienced the same experiences I have. I wasn’t being a good neighbor or loving others as I love myself. I needed to realize that not everyone has had the same experiences I had that have helped me grow and be a more courteous driver(and surely, they've had other experiences in their life that made them better in other instances than myself). Simply, I needed to be way more considerate of my neighbor and to love them as I love myself; to give them mercy and be more patient when they didn’t live up to being considerate towards me when it was expected. I realized that loving my neighbor also meant that I love and respect them where they are in life and in their current understanding of a given situation. I figured out how important this is because I realized that I, Sean, certainly lack in many areas of life that I have yet to grow. And what would I appreciate from others when I fail (which I often do)? That they please be graceful, kind, and more understanding when I drop the ball in those areas where I have room to grow.

This new enlightenment forever changed the way I drive and the way I respond to my experiences on the road. Ultimately, it has given me a greater measure and understanding to live up to when it comes to loving my neighbor as myself—one of the most important instructions from Almighty God, the creator of all things. To the point, it pushed me to notice the importance of putting others before myself—the importance of truly striving to love others as I love myself. Once I understood how important it was to apply this command to love others as I love myself in all things big and small, something beautiful happened; I no longer became affected by the drivers around me. Why? I became more understanding More forgiving. More loving.

Did someone cut me off? No problem, it happens. Maybe they didn’t see me. Someone ran a red light and almost hit me—sure, I was startled, yet after a breath or two, I'd realize that maybe they hadn’t noticed the light change because they themselves were avoiding another driver… or they simply didn’t time it right that time. I have done that before, right? No worries, glad we are both safe. I stopped judging that person and thinking that they were the same driver I always saw run the red lights—the classic repeat offender (that they always run the light). Instead, I applied ways to be more understanding and forgiving.

Time and time again, I began to grow into a driver that wasn’t affected by the cars and decisions of those around me. I was being more loving by being more understanding and forgiving. Cultivating the peace and patience of what Scripture calls the fruit of the spirit:

Now the deeds of the flesh are evident, which are: sexual immorality, impurity, indecent behavior, idolatry, witchcraft, hostilities, strife, jealousy, outbursts of anger, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, envy, drunkenness, carousing, and things like these, of which I forewarn you, just as I have forewarned you, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God. But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:19-23

The beauty was not only felt within me, by being less stressed and aggravated on the road but it was felt around me. Surely, I was being nicer to others. I didn’t bring the stress of my commute into the workplace. No longer did I bring that sort of tension into my home. Less and less did I pass on my “road rage” to others. In fact, the rage became almost non-existent. Not only was I grateful for that, but I hope you have been too.

Never would I have thought that the way I handled the simple task of driving could have such a major impact on my life and the lives of those around me. In fact, writing this very blog post reminds me that most of the stress and grievances we deal with in life start small and grow big and tumultuous rather quickly. The small noise is what typically grows and festers into the big commotion. That also applies to the importance of noticing and growing in the little things that can help impact us positively in a massive way. I figured out that God had all this in mind when he gave his numerous instructions recorded in the Law of Moses and exhibited by his son, our Messiah (He is the Law of Moses in the flesh, after all). That each of these perfect instructions, which are the ways of God himself, all deal with handling the small and the big instances we deal with in our daily life. Each of his instructions accomplishes two things that blend into one another. Each of his perfect instructions teaches us and guides us to ultimately:

Love God and Love others.

Oh, if we made these instructions our two daily and life goals, and put them at the forefront of our minds! To strive to love God, and to do everything we can, great and small, to love others. Wow oh wow, what an impact it would have within us! What effect it would have within our household, our neighborhood, our city, our state—our world! The annoying and difficult interactions we had with those around us would become smaller and smaller. The positive and encouraging interactions would grow greater and greater! I truly think, if we all started small, like striving to love our neighbor on our daily commute… the impact would be huge. Could you imagine if everyone used their turn signals? If everyone drove with others in mind? Drove as if they happily shared the road? That would be awesome! And that's just a little change in one category of life that would make a great impact on so many people.

I truly believe that when we notice the little things and make little positive adjustments, they can be totally life-changing. I know that when we do anything, we can love God and love others as ourselves at that moment, just as Messiah did, and we can change the world around us.

I know this seems like a long shot. But I know that I can only do my part. We can only do our part. We can start small and see how it unfolds. I guarantee, it will change your life just as it has mine—which still has a lot more room to grow.

With all that being said, I ask each of us… to please…just please, for the love of God… use your blinking turn signal.

Big thanks, from your friendly neighbor.

I hope you keep this blog in mind as you read 1 John today, which only takes minutes to read in full. You won’t regret it.

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Sean is a former Atheist who was finally awoken to the reality of our Creator—which led him to the one place he thought he would never step foot: “Bible College.” During his studies, our Heavenly Father flipped his Christian worldview upside down in order to reveal the Whole truth of His perfect Word. As a follower of Messiah Yeshua (Christ Jesus), Sean encourages believers to deepen their faith, seek the truth, test everything, and be willing to walk in the true image they were created: the image of the Most High and His flawless Son.